I've been pretty lucky in my career. People have liked my work, and I've been able to advance up the ladder. I I've held myself back a lot too though because, frankly, I hear murmur of how guys are intimidated by successful women, and my goal in life, despite popular albeit misguided belief, is not to be the CEO of a Fortune 500. I'm still on the fence but leaning toward turning down an offered advancement right now. I just don't want to be THAT girl, even if it is who seem to be.
But regardless of where I end up career-wise, in my Church, with my family, in a book club, at a grocery store - strong women SCARE me. Their forcefulness, their "everyone needs to respect me because I am woman and deserve it" mentality annoys me. We need to earn respect just as much as a man needs to. Demanding it when you don't deserve it, when you step on all our toes, and when you are rude to everyone else, despite the fact your gender has been historically discriminated against over the year, does not mean you deserve it.
But, I have to work with people like this everyday, and I really need to learn how not to cower into the corner. My upper management is working with me, giving me opportunities to demonstrate my competence in the workplace. But I still need confidence.
I've started reading books that I hope will help. This is the first I read. This doesn't only apply to the workplace. This book covers all aspects of life. I recommend this book to all women, regardless of which category you fall under. I hope those who like me are a bit afraid, can gain some confidence, some understanding, some methods of standing up. For those of you who feel you are always in the middle, you are being used to do harm where you didn't intend to cause any... or maybe you enjoy it even if you aren't the mastermind. And to you who are the queens bees, well, frankly, you will probably think that you aren't actually that bad, but you are, back off, pick on someone your own size, maybe seek some help (not that I could ever say any of that to your face.)I'm hoping the other books I read help me as this one has done.
Posted by Caprene
Labels: and afraid-to-bees, liked, mean girls grown up: adult women who are still queen bees, middle bees